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Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2019 22:53:29 GMT
daisy24601 It’s perfectly normal to feel like this. I’ve been depressed on and off for much of my life. Over the years I have found a few things that work really well for me. Understand what keeps me on a even keel. If I don’t listen to music everyday and get outside for at least 30 minutes, I am toast. Even just ten minutes of meditation helps. I like Headspace (others prefer Calm) but I don’t think it matters as long as you like it and you do it every day. Avoid social media. I’ve given up on Facebook, have limited Instagram time and don’t read twitter in the evening. I have replaced them all with Theatreboard, which some might say is still social media, but I find it much more constructive. Talking therapy works, but only if you actually have a rapport with the therapist and are committed to the process. I think getting help is hard, and it can be doubly difficult to say that the person isn’t right, but you have to have someone you are really comfortable with. There are also some online services now (Qwell, Big White Wall, IESO and BetterHelp are good places to start. )
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Post by MrsCondomine on Mar 15, 2019 8:52:37 GMT
Today a disgruntled candidate decided to post an anonymous google review about me. There’s no attempt to provide constructive feedback, just an (arguably libellous) rant. I’ve cried on and off all day, which is ridiculous because I am a grown woman. Sending you a cuddle @happysooz - it's not ridiculous, it's a normal response to someone being hurtful and idiotic. Your anonymous person is a thing rhyming with "mat"! |
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Post by lynette on Mar 15, 2019 10:47:36 GMT
There are other cool rhymes we could offer 🤪 but I would get into trouble with my fellow mods... This thing about connecting is interesting to me because I’m the woman in the queue who makes the remark, the one who moans aloud about the loos at the Donmar, who addresses babies in buggies with supporting comments and this was always so embarrassing for my own kids. But what I think it is, is actually helping me, allowing me to connect, be part of the community and so on in a teeny little way. Very occasionally I can see that it helps someone else.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2019 13:13:06 GMT
Thing I learned today - there's a site called cameo.com where celebs (including some big name actors) can pimp themselves out for cash to do "personalised shout out" videos for fans. Which is presumably where all the videos in stories along the lines of "Celeb x does amazing video message for couple's wedding" come from.
Not a criticism (and no different I think from selling autographs at conventions) but the fact this is done on a commercial basis was news to me!
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Post by david on Mar 15, 2019 13:29:48 GMT
In other news, mild brainstorm lead to me booking to see "Riverdance" next year. Never, ever, seen it before, and curiosity overcame common sense. There's a warning to you all in there somewhere, I think. I’ve just done the same for the Liverpool Empire stop next May. |
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Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2019 15:09:14 GMT
That confirms it, the Government have put something in the water supply to distract us all from Brexit... I now have this image of Theresa May standing outside Number 10 saying "In light of the current situation I have decided that Ooh look a squirrel!" |
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Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2019 15:12:51 GMT
There are other cool rhymes we could offer 🤪 but I would get into trouble with my fellow mods... This thing about connecting is interesting to me because I’m the woman in the queue who makes the remark, the one who moans aloud about the loos at the Donmar, who addresses babies in buggies with supporting comments and this was always so embarrassing for my own kids. But what I think it is, is actually helping me, allowing me to connect, be part of the community and so on in a teeny little way. Very occasionally I can see that it helps someone else. +1 to the loo line talkers! Isolation and loneliness are depression’s foot soldiers. You might never know when your smile, compliment or comment came at a perfect time for someone. I try to do it, even when I don’t have many spoons left, because you don’t know if someone else might be down to their last spoon, and you’re the thing that gives them a connection. Also, people are amazing and it’s just nice to talk to strangers (no matter what your parents told us.) (I don’t know how to do links on mobile: Spoon theory: en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoon_theory) |
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Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2019 15:16:05 GMT
Apparently Caitlyn Jenner is an "icon", who knew! I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed of how many of these slebs for hire I recognise...
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Post by daisy24601 on Mar 15, 2019 17:00:06 GMT
There are other cool rhymes we could offer 🤪 but I would get into trouble with my fellow mods... This thing about connecting is interesting to me because I’m the woman in the queue who makes the remark, the one who moans aloud about the loos at the Donmar, who addresses babies in buggies with supporting comments and this was always so embarrassing for my own kids. But what I think it is, is actually helping me, allowing me to connect, be part of the community and so on in a teeny little way. Very occasionally I can see that it helps someone else. +1 to the loo line talkers! Isolation and loneliness are depression’s foot soldiers. You might never know when your smile, compliment or comment came at a perfect time for someone. I try to do it, even when I don’t have many spoons left, because you don’t know if someone else might be down to their last spoon, and you’re the thing that gives them a connection. Also, people are amazing and it’s just nice to talk to strangers (no matter what your parents told us.) (I don’t know how to do links on mobile: Spoon theory: en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoon_theory)The biggest problem for me. It's a vicious circle, I want relationship more than anything but am so painfully shy and awkward that I can't speak to people. Asking me to talk to a stranger is like asking me to run when I have no legs. My extrovert friends don't understand it at all and it's quite hard to explain. |
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Post by Dawnstar on Mar 15, 2019 20:15:19 GMT
In other news, mild brainstorm lead to me booking to see "Riverdance" next year. Never, ever, seen it before, and curiosity overcame common sense. There's a warning to you all in there somewhere, I think. I've never seen them live but when I was a child my grandmother had a video of them that I watched loads of times. That was the original cast, before Michael Flatley formed another group. Somehow I've never considered seeing them live though. I'm glad to see that some people find this board nice & supportive. I'm afraid I don't always find it that way myself, as there is a tendency to "jump" on people rather harshly at times. However there are some kind & understanding members, especially @theatremonkey. |
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Post by daisy24601 on Mar 15, 2019 23:33:50 GMT
My extrovert friends don't understand it at all and it's quite hard to explain. And you don't need to. It's how you feel, and that's fine. It happens to be part of your own personality and it's really fine to accept it, it really is. Talking to anyone else is something we learn, and some either learn it early or fake it (usually those who need drinks and are loud to cover it up). Some actually don't learn it until they are far, far older, and a few don't at all! My own thought is that the big problem is actually school! A place where you are locked up most of the year with 30 or so other randoms, who will remember everything you say and jump on it to cover up their own shortcomings. Quiet is a very good option, isn't it? Just to add, though, you aren't that shy and awkward, as you have loads of friends on here and come over just fine when you post. So, there's that side to your personality too. One day, someone will certainly see it shine in the real world and you'll be away. Relax, you are doing just fine. Thank you, this is very sweet. I tend to be okay when people talk to me first, but the other way round is very different! I was at a friend's house tonight, me and five men (ideal Friday night!) and I'm realising lately I'm more comfortable talking to men than women for some reason. |
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2019 9:30:53 GMT
I've just ordered myself a new computer, as my current one is eight years old and feeling it. Strangely, the price turned out to be almost identical to the very first computer I bought back when the state of the art was a 100 MHz Pentium and a massive 1.6 GB disk. Far easier to order, though: that first computer involved writing a letter and a trip down to the store to discuss requirements in person.
It was beige. For some reason the entire computer world collectively decided: "You know what just screams futuristic and powerful? Beige."
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2019 9:45:31 GMT
I've just ordered myself a new computer, as my current one is eight years old and feeling it. Strangely, the price turned out to be almost identical to the very first computer I bought back when the state of the art was a 100 MHz Pentium and a massive 1.6 GB disk. Far easier to order, though: that first computer involved writing a letter and a trip down to the store to discuss requirements in person. It was beige. For some reason the entire computer world collectively decided: "You know what just screams futuristic and powerful? Beige." Can't beat that new toy feeling! So glad those huge beige towers and those horribly chunky beige CRT Monitors went out of fashion. |
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2019 13:01:26 GMT
Does anyone ever win those things? Like the Official London Theatre monthly ticket giveaways. Never hear about winners. I'm sure they're just exercises in data collection.
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Post by Dawnstar on Mar 16, 2019 13:21:33 GMT
The biggest problem for me. It's a vicious circle, I want relationship more than anything but am so painfully shy and awkward that I can't speak to people. Asking me to talk to a stranger is like asking me to run when I have no legs. My extrovert friends don't understand it at all and it's quite hard to explain. At least you evidently have a number of friends though, which shows that you can manage to have social relationships. I have one friend, who I met at school when we were 9 but rarely see nowadays as she married & moved elsewhere. Since then I've never managed to make friends with anyone else. So you should find it encouraging that you have been able to make friends with multiple people. |
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Post by Dawnstar on Mar 16, 2019 13:22:45 GMT
Does anyone ever win those things? Like the Official London Theatre monthly ticket giveaways. Never hear about winners. I'm sure they're just exercises in data collection. I once won a pair of free tickets for a play at my local theatre, via Twitter. Never had any luck with any ticket competitions on a national scale though. |
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Post by anita on Mar 16, 2019 13:51:01 GMT
Annoyed at a facebook competition for tickets to Michael Ball concert. You have to put your mother but she is dead . Tried to get my grown up kids to enter for me but they have all quit facebook as it is "boring".
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Post by Dawnstar on Mar 17, 2019 1:23:25 GMT
The biggest problem for me. It's a vicious circle, I want relationship more than anything but am so painfully shy and awkward that I can't speak to people. Asking me to talk to a stranger is like asking me to run when I have no legs. My extrovert friends don't understand it at all and it's quite hard to explain. I had something like this just this evening at Showstopper. When I came into the foyer from going to the loo after the show there was a group of five fans standing talking together & I wanted to join them but just could not make myself do it. Three of the people I'm acquainted with but not the other two. So I just stood like an idiot nearby for about 15 minutes until the group broke up & I finally managed to make myself speak to one of the people I'm acquainted with as everyone was leaving. |
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Post by daisy24601 on Mar 17, 2019 1:34:56 GMT
The biggest problem for me. It's a vicious circle, I want relationship more than anything but am so painfully shy and awkward that I can't speak to people. Asking me to talk to a stranger is like asking me to run when I have no legs. My extrovert friends don't understand it at all and it's quite hard to explain. At least you evidently have a number of friends though, which shows that you can manage to have social relationships. I have one friend, who I met at school when we were 9 but rarely see nowadays as she married & moved elsewhere. Since then I've never managed to make friends with anyone else. So you should find it encouraging that you have been able to make friends with multiple people. I'm sorry to hear that, do you do any social things at all? I really have to push myself to do it but that's the only way I meet people. I'd say I have acquaintances at the moment more than close friends apart from then ones I live with, but I do appreciate having them as I know there are people who don't have anyone  I'm realising lately I'm more comfortable talking to men than women for some reason. Funny enough, I was always more confident talking to women rather than men. All builds confidence, so all good  . Interesting, I've been wondering why that is. I think I find men less judgemental. |
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Post by Dawnstar on Mar 17, 2019 13:47:11 GMT
I'm sorry to hear that, do you do any social things at all? I really have to push myself to do it but that's the only way I meet people. I'd say I have acquaintances at the moment more than close friends apart from then ones I live with, but I do appreciate having them as I know there are people who don't have anyone No, as socialising generally involves going to pubs & not only do I not drink myself but I also dislike the smell of everyone else drinking. However I wasn't posting to try to get sympathy for myself but in the hope that it would encourage you to know that there are other people who find socialising very difficult & that you're managing better than some of us. If I'm not helping please let me know & I'll keep quiet! |
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Post by NeilVHughes on Mar 17, 2019 16:46:52 GMT
An enthralling afternoon in the company of Kenneth Branagh.
All is True and a post screening Q&A at the Kiln.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2019 16:03:58 GMT
A few days ago YouTube threw up a video about baked onions. I have no idea why as neither baking nor onions are interests of mine, but I watched out of curiosity and baked onion was described as delicious so I thought I'd give it a go.
In the video the chef neatly sliced off the end of the cooked onion and squeezed it out of its skin in one fluid motion. This is clearly some sort of special effect because the reality is that a baked onion is basically a ball of incandescent hell. There is no material known that can be used to touch a baked onion without your fingers blistering to the bone. It took five minutes of chasing it around the plate with knives before I was able to separate the useful part of the onion from the inedible bits.
And the result? It's an onion. I don't know what else I was expecting.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2019 16:41:44 GMT
The biggest problem for me. It's a vicious circle, I want relationship more than anything but am so painfully shy and awkward that I can't speak to people. Asking me to talk to a stranger is like asking me to run when I have no legs. My extrovert friends don't understand it at all and it's quite hard to explain. I had something like this just this evening at Showstopper. When I came into the foyer from going to the loo after the show there was a group of five fans standing talking together & I wanted to join them but just could not make myself do it. Three of the people I'm acquainted with but not the other two. So I just stood like an idiot nearby for about 15 minutes until the group broke up & I finally managed to make myself speak to one of the people I'm acquainted with as everyone was leaving. One thing to look out for in a situation like that...I try and get people to stand in more of a horseshoe shape, rather than a circle, so that it’s easy for someone to join. If you ever see a horseshoe shape, I think you can be reasonably confident that you are welcome to join the group. And I deliberately say join the group and not the conversation, because it’s perfectly reasonable to join and not say much. |
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Post by NeilVHughes on Mar 18, 2019 17:23:39 GMT
Sweeping generalisation #236
for general platitudes speak to a man, for conversation talk with a woman.
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Post by daisy24601 on Mar 18, 2019 22:55:39 GMT
I'm sorry to hear that, do you do any social things at all? I really have to push myself to do it but that's the only way I meet people. I'd say I have acquaintances at the moment more than close friends apart from then ones I live with, but I do appreciate having them as I know there are people who don't have anyone No, as socialising generally involves going to pubs & not only do I not drink myself but I also dislike the smell of everyone else drinking. However I wasn't posting to try to get sympathy for myself but in the hope that it would encourage you to know that there are other people who find socialising very difficult & that you're managing better than some of us. If I'm not helping please let me know & I'll keep quiet! Not at all |
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