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Post by intoanewlife on Feb 10, 2020 19:50:53 GMT
He loved her for 27 years and said yesterday that he loves her more now than he ever has. His ability to love someone has nothing to do with his sexuality nor is it in anyway at all an indictment on her. I'm shocked that someone thinks just because he said he loved her that it makes everything ok. Unless she knew from the day she married him she will be going through all sorts of emotions and second guessing her life, her future etc. If she didnt know then her life has been ripped apart and has been based on a lie. You dont just get passed that with him saying 'I love you'. Its a different type of love and not the one she was signing up for yikes... |
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Post by kathryn on Feb 10, 2020 22:01:42 GMT
But as soon as I say my husband in a conversation with someone I am also announcing my sexuality because until that point the assumption is I'm straight. And even now in the UK I'll sometimes not say it because I'm unsure of the reaction. Saying that heterosexual people don't announce it isn't a particularly helpful statement to be honest. That’s announcing your relationship, and incidentally your sexuality (assuming of course your gender is obvious), it’s not sitting people down before you even have a date never mind a husband and “coming out”. I have no issue knowing someone’s sexuality (or assumed sexuality given their circumstances, just cos you’re a woman with a husband doesn’t mean your not bi), I just don’t need to be told it separately. Unless I am interested in them sexually it makes no difference to me, or changes who they are. But it makes a difference to them. It might even make a difference is tangibly practical ways - For example, they may not want to go on holiday with you to a country where being gay is still illegal, or eat at a fast food chain that gives money to politicians who support anti-gay policies, or go to a church that preaches that being gay is sinful. They might need you to know that gay they are a victim of homophobic bullying at school or work. They might need your vote on issues such as gay marriage, or gay parental rights, or gay anti-discrimination laws. |
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Post by marypoppins on Feb 10, 2020 23:31:47 GMT
That’s announcing your relationship, and incidentally your sexuality (assuming of course your gender is obvious), it’s not sitting people down before you even have a date never mind a husband and “coming out”. I have no issue knowing someone’s sexuality (or assumed sexuality given their circumstances, just cos you’re a woman with a husband doesn’t mean your not bi), I just don’t need to be told it separately. Unless I am interested in them sexually it makes no difference to me, or changes who they are. But it makes a difference to them. It might even make a difference is tangibly practical ways - For example, they may not want to go on holiday with you to a country where being gay is still illegal, or eat at a fast food chain that gives money to politicians who support anti-gay policies, or go to a church that preaches that being gay is sinful. They might need you to know that gay they are a victim of homophobic bullying at school or work. They might need your vote on issues such as gay marriage, or gay parental rights, or gay anti-discrimination laws. I see what you’re saying, but equally those things are just part of wanting to live in a fair society and you don’t need to be gay to have those opinions. If everyone cared less about other people’s sexuality then there would be far less homophobia etc, and there wouldn’t need to be gay rights because everyone would have equal human rights. |
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Post by kathryn on Feb 10, 2020 23:56:12 GMT
If, if, if...
We don’t live in that society - not yet. The world is not fair, or just.
People are still discriminated against.
We can’t wish it into being over night. If we want it we have to fight for it.
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Post by steve10086 on Feb 11, 2020 6:43:52 GMT
If, if, if... We don’t live in that society - not yet. The world is not fair, or just. People are still discriminated against. We can’t wish it into being over night. If we want it we have to fight for it. Wish I could “like” this more than once. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 11, 2020 12:53:22 GMT
There's a fine line between 'private - and no-one else's business' and 'secret, shameful - not to be spoken of in polite company'. For a long time being gay was the latter, and it did no-one any favours. Our society is organised around the nuclear family - marriages, parentage, divorces all have to be public knowledge as a result. Though I notice that Fern and Phil getting a divorce did not prompt nearly as much interest. Until we live in a world where bisexuality is assumed to be the norm and whether one's partner is male or female is a matter of mild gossip-interest, and nothing more, a public figure coming out will continue to be newsworthy. I saw online about Fern and Phil Vickery but to be fair Schofe is a lot more high profile than Fern at this time. Her marriage to Phil Vickery was well publicised.
I'd take the view that high profile people coming out is good for others thinking of doing so. The Beeb interviewed a chap from some Manchester Gay Project or Support Group who said it was a good, relevant thing that Schofe had come out as it may help other older people to do so and may stop internal conflict within themselves.
I take the view that someone's sexuality is their own but if they decide to come out, announce they are straight, bi etc it is up to them and we treat that person exactly the same as before.
It's not like an MP defecting from one party to another and factions celebrating "We've got another one".
Schofe's announcement was briefly mentioned on DOI on Sunday by Ashley Banjo. There was no great fanfare from John Barrowman who I thought might have been the person to comment on it. Ashley pitched it just right and then show then continued as normal which I thought was perfect.
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Post by marypoppins on Feb 11, 2020 18:39:03 GMT
If, if, if... We don’t live in that society - not yet. The world is not fair, or just. People are still discriminated against. We can’t wish it into being over night. If we want it we have to fight for it. I’m aware it isn’t, and that makes me sad. I agree equality is something worth fighting for, but sure it would better to fight the people who don’t agree rather than the ones who do? |
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Post by kathryn on Feb 11, 2020 20:06:01 GMT
I don’t think we’re fighting, are we? Just disagreeing over a nuance.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 10, 2020 17:57:14 GMT
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Post by intoanewlife on Mar 10, 2020 18:50:14 GMT
Disgusting!
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Post by BurlyBeaR on Mar 10, 2020 21:52:20 GMT
No surprise there then.
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Post by alece10 on Mar 11, 2020 8:22:29 GMT
Exactly. We just knew the press were behind it somewhere. They will never get any better. |
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Post by basi1faw1ty on Mar 11, 2020 10:55:26 GMT
And D** W****** is involved. Shocker.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2020 12:43:08 GMT
I hope it comes back to bite them. It would be interesting if they suddenly found that media companies and celebrities won't touch them.
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Post by oxfordsimon on Mar 11, 2020 15:20:54 GMT
It is very easy to bash the press. But they got this story from somewhere. And, if we are to believe what has been mentioned elsewhere, if the story originated from a disgruntled ex who also happened to work on This Morning, then it would have made it's way into the open at some point.
There is a significant difference to approaching a celeb saying that a story is doing the rounds, you might want to manage things to minimize distress and approaching the celeb and saying give us the exclusive or we publish.
We don't know what was said between any member of the press and PS.
It should never have been a big story. But at the heart of it seems to be someone trying to sell it. It would seem that that person has not profited from it and PS has managed this crisis point with dignity.
I tend not to believe everything in the media and not to believe everything that is said about the media.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2020 15:36:58 GMT
And D** W****** is involved. Shocker. Ever since I first saw him there has been something that I just don't like about him. I would guess he'd probably be removed from shows like Lorraine going forward. If Schofe had sued the Scum then it would have been interesting. There was always a rumour the tabloids knew of Heather Mills past but when she was married to Paul McCartney they were scared of Sir Macca's lawyers taking them to court. |
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Post by kathryn on Mar 11, 2020 16:26:55 GMT
It is very easy to bash the press. But they got this story from somewhere. And, if we are to believe what has been mentioned elsewhere, if the story originated from a disgruntled ex who also happened to work on This Morning, then it would have made it's way into the open at some point. . Hmm. The suggestion from Byline is that Dan Wootton picked up the story when he was at ITV studios doing spots for Lorraine, rather than a disgruntled ex actively approaching the newspaper with it. I don’t know exactly where the ‘disgruntled ex was going to sell his story to the tabloids’ story came from - and if it was sourced or merely speculation. It is of course possible that both are partly true - that DW found out about said ex when he was working at ITV studios, either through a direct meeting or workplace gossip, and he was merely a convenient conduit for a story that would have surfaced anyway. But certainly it seems likely that the story as presented to us by Phil and The Sun was motivated by the threat of a much-less-flattering story about his private life being imminent. |
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