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Post by itsemily on Feb 25, 2018 18:47:13 GMT
Over heard at Flashdance last night at the beginning when Alex Owens cycles on to the stage the old lady behind me said 'I never knew Joanne Clifton could ride a bike, she never did that on Strictly' - I suppose its a perfectly true statement, but how random!
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Post by jampot on Feb 25, 2018 19:00:20 GMT
An empty sweet wrappper for the last 30 min of Long days journey into night yesterday...
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Post by bellboard27 on Mar 14, 2018 23:00:03 GMT
Was at a production at a drama school this afternoon. Behind me sat a father and son. In later conversation it transpired that the father was an actor who had been at the drama school and the son was to audition.
When they first sat down the son was keen on his hat. “Take it off”, said the father. “I don’t want to”, came the reply. “When you are in a theatre with me you will show respect. Take it off.” It came off.
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Post by catlover74 on Mar 14, 2018 23:34:06 GMT
if Sir Pat wants to play a poo emoji Sir Cow Pat? I’m ashamed to say I’m still cracking up laughing here at this. 🤣 |
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Post by maggiem on Mar 15, 2018 16:58:52 GMT
I’m ashamed to say I’m still cracking up laughing here at this. 🤣 You're not the only one!  |
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Post by haz23 on Mar 20, 2018 12:48:34 GMT
"What time does the 2.30pm matinee start?"
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Post by bellboard27 on Mar 20, 2018 15:34:58 GMT
"What time does the 2.30pm matinee start?" Well?
Don't leave us in suspense!
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Post by alece10 on Mar 20, 2018 21:12:41 GMT
At 42nd Street last night (Lulu's) first night.
At the end of Act 1 Dorothy Brock injurs her foot and Julian Marsh comes to the front of the stage to announce that Dorothy Brock can't continue and the show is cancelled. Someone in the front row said quite loudly "thank god".
Rude....
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Post by Deleted on Mar 20, 2018 21:22:33 GMT
^ Ouch! A case of Boom Bang-a-Bang loud in my ear!
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Post by mistressjojo on Mar 21, 2018 1:41:59 GMT
"What time does the 2.30pm matinee start?" Well?
Don't leave us in suspense!
I made fun of a friend once for asking a priest what time Midnight Mass was. Turned out it wasn't at midnight! |
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Post by kathryn on Mar 21, 2018 9:38:21 GMT
I’m ashamed to say I’m still cracking up laughing here at this. 🤣 You know what? I read all the Emoji movie reviews - which were terrible - and no-one else came up with that pun! Where were you, Monkey, in the film community's hour of need? |
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Post by Dr Tom on Mar 21, 2018 17:43:26 GMT
At the interval of Evita last night, two men in the row behind me (who before the show has been playing Revel Roulette).
“I don’t have a clue what’s going on, I fell asleep for half of it”.
“That’s okay, neither do I!”
Someone they were with did try and explain, but I’m not sure it helped.
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Post by Phantom of London on Mar 21, 2018 22:14:57 GMT
Sometimes you also hear very unsavoury things in the stalls.
I am sure it was Cat On A Hot Tin Roof in Northampton, anyway there was this old overweight block chewing a sweet, he appeared to be an Edward Heath kind of bloke, who had a hatred of all women and a bachelor - anyway there was an untastedul domestic violence scene, where the old bloke quite audible said and heard by me and audience members around him, they gasped “let the bitch have it”, think I was more stunned and thinking did he really say that.
Theatre ain’t a great place to think out loud.
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Post by Dr Tom on Mar 22, 2018 22:30:27 GMT
Kinky Boots tonight, interval talk, from one of a loud group of women sat in the row behind:
“Do you think any of those Angels might be gay?”
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Post by shady23 on Mar 23, 2018 18:26:13 GMT
Just before The Last Ship starts the cast wander around chatting to the audience (don't worry non audience participation fans, it's painless!) "The Poet" from the shipyard said to someone "You having a good night?" and he replied "yeah, really looking forward to seeing Jimmy Nail!" I did giggle.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 23, 2018 18:57:15 GMT
I suspect this is a niche comment but my favourite audience remark ever is the guy in front of me on the way out of a Michael Nyman concert who said huffily “Well he’s certainly no Terry Riley!”
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Post by TallPaul on Mar 24, 2018 12:14:37 GMT
I suspect this is a niche comment but my favourite audience remark ever is the guy in front of me on the way out of a Michael Nyman concert who said huffily “Well he’s certainly no Terry Riley!” Until a few weeks ago, that would have gone straight over my head, but I watched the Charles Hazlewood mini-series on BBC4 a few Fridays ago, and I'm now practically an expert on minimalism.  |
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Post by Dr Tom on Mar 29, 2018 6:57:45 GMT
“They’re not camp, they’re just gay”
Mother talking to daughter (I presume) discussing the show during the interval at Jamie yesterday. They were sat in the row behind me.
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Post by TallPaul on Apr 1, 2018 10:42:59 GMT
No word of a lie, I heard this with my very own ears yesterday afternoon at Cast Theatre in Doncaster.
One member of staff asked her colleague, "How do you spell interval?"
Had I been the colleague, I think I would have answered, "Y-O-U A-R-E F-I-R-E-D."
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Post by HereForTheatre on Apr 1, 2018 10:57:30 GMT
No word of a lie, I heard this with my very own ears yesterday afternoon at Cast Theatre in Doncaster. One member of staff asked her colleague, "How do you spell interval?" Had I been the colleague, I think I would have answered, "Y-O-U A-R-E F-I-R-E-D." They could have been dyslexic. |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 1, 2018 11:58:27 GMT
Possible... Or just good old ‘thick’.
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Post by HereForTheatre on Apr 1, 2018 12:09:08 GMT
Possible... Or just good old ‘thick’. I'd prefer to give them the benefit of the doubt. |
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Post by TallPaul on Apr 1, 2018 12:11:54 GMT
On reflection, as it's Easter, I'm going to give the young woman the benefit of the doubt. I'm not so proud that I can't admit I may have been too quick to judge. (But @caiaphas could be right. He sometimes, very occasionally, is!)
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Post by Deleted on Apr 1, 2018 13:07:13 GMT
And as it's Easter I hope I will be permitted to report something overheard not in a theatre but in a supermarket some years ago. (More entertaining than Pinocchio at the NT yesterday anyway...) It was in a Somerfield (I don't think they even exist now) which was a crappy sort of supermarket you had to resort to when your supermarket of choice was too far to get to and you had run out of/were desperate for summat. Anyway, it was over a busy lunchtime and there was just one checkout open. There was a long queue and I was about forth in it. I have a feeling I just had an Arctic Roll in my basket. It went something like this:
Checkout girl: (Stressed. Ringing the till and holding up a single aubergine, knowing she must weigh it before ringing it through.) Does anyone know what this is?
Voice from back: (Calling.) An erbergine!
Checkout girl: (Shouting.) WHAT?!?
Voice from back: (Louder.) AN ER-BER-GINE!!!
(Checkout girl starts jamming at various keys on the till. Then huffs and swears under her breath.)
Checkout girl: (Louder still.) IS THAT WITH AN 'E' OR A 'HAITCH'?!?
Made me chuckle... That's why I loved Victoria Wood. I could watch her stuff all day...
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Post by Deleted on Apr 1, 2018 19:16:16 GMT
As it’s Easter as well....
On the tube back to Victoria a family got on who had been to The Lion King. Mum to middle child “Which was your favourite character Artie” (yes he was called Artie...)
Pause
“The Lion King”
Pause
“The one that might have been a girl or might have been a boy”
Another pause
*starts singing Hakuna Matata*
I’d normally rather be 100 miles from both Lion King and groups of kids. But it was pretty damn cute.
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