Bad Behaviour at a Show

Been racking my brains for the last four minutes. It's because people who have row B tickets are really in row C as there is no row A. Causing all kinds of confusion.

Am I right?

It's apparently easily done. I had the classic of somebody sitting in the front row the other day, another party turned up, of course the original people were front row of the circle not the stalls (not a great reflection on ushering these days that it was missed when letting them in!)

Sorry, yes, I described it incompletely. dollybm explained it better. People who were in Rows B, C, D, etc. simply counted back on the assumption that the first row they saw was A, when it was really B. And when people were trying to explain this to the folks in the wrong seats, they turned to me for confirmation that "this is really Row D?" Yes, my seat is in Row D. (To give credit to the usher, when I arrived she did tell me D was the 3rd row from the front, so she tried to prevent the confusion.)

I just realized that it was the usher at the entrance to the stalls that scanned the ticket rather than at the theater entrance.  If the machine could be set to signal the scan is for the wrong section, that might help everyone at least be in the correct area.

In the past have had Row AA as first row. So Row A second.

It is a highly complex subject and not really one to be had in this thread, but overzealous fans displaying odd behaviours and actual dangerous stalkers are 2 completely different things. Far more 'normal' people attract stalkers than famous people do simply because they are easier targets and more accessible. We are all bread and butter for these parasites.

But people displaying the bad behaviors you are talking about are more 'Stans' (over the top fans) than stalkers. Though it would not surprise me if a lot of them are on the start of the Cluster B spectrum these days and are more than likely borderlines with very little impulse control. Actual stalkers are far too clever to act in such ways especially in public, as this would draw attention to themselves and endanger their future plans. 

Fans in general are looking for some kind of connection with the subject of their fandom. A stalker seeks to own, control and when this fails, destroy the 'object' that they have decided is theirs. 

A fan will have a reason for being a fan of someone ie they're either attracted to them or admire their talent etc. A stalker will spot a victim, assess them to see if they can manipulated into being 'owned' and their only attraction to them is what that person can do for them and the fact they can be controlled.

A fan is overt, they want to be noticed by the person they are a fan of, so they will go see them many times, stage door or hang out by their homes. A stalker is covert and is far more likely to study them, enter into their social life and circles and attach themselves that way. They rarely turn to what we know as 'traditional' stalking until AFTER they've had some kind of a relationship with the person or failed in their quest to attach properly through either friendship, social or romantic relationship.

Of course a 'regular' fan too can sometimes over do it. They get caught up in the moment and dim their empathy to sometimes get what they want and display some truly worrying and disturbing behavior. But most can/will be snapped out their delusions quick smart by someone telling them what morons they are being. Stalkers usually always have the more serious Cluster B personality disorders (they're a narcissist or anti-social) and have no empathy to begin with and will not stop until the law is brought in or they find a new obsession. Even then they will still always believe that that person was 'theirs' and in their mind always will be.

On the flip side, there is a very big difference between a performer who has an actual stalker and a narcissistic chorus kid who thinks everyone is in love with them and is stalking them because they follow them on social media and go to a few too many shows. If someone ever had an actual stalker, I would assume they would be very hypersensitive to fans in general afterwards, which probably tells you why some people freak out over nothing and others are not phased by the oddest of the odd behaviour.

Either way though, all serious claims should be investigated as the rate that personality disorders are increasing because of the effects of social media and societal and political tribalisim (from 3-5% of the population in the 80's to around 35% today) I doubt it will be long before this starts to become an even bigger and more obvious challenge for all of us than it already is.

I can honestly tell you from when I used to work in theatres that the general public are often spectacularly, PAINFULLY clueless when they go to the theatre. You can tell them EVERYTHING they need to know: seat, level, bars, toilets, EVERYTHING and they will still go the wrong way and end up in the balcony when they should be in the stalls.

Of course then there's the classics: The man desperately looking for his seat and is angry when you can't tell him where it is. He doesn't remember and when asked for his ticket, of course, his wife has them.

Then there's those who you find wandering around the bar and when you ask them where they're sitting they confidently tell you "Les Mis". At least they're in the right building, there are those who genuinely try to enter the wrong building for the wrong show, big flashing signs on the side displaying the title be damned!

I once gave an old woman directions to her seat. I informed her that she was in row L, a few feet away (I even pointed) and informed her that should she need them, there are toilets and a bar at the back. A few minutes later she comes back FURIOUS ranting and raving about me sending her to the back of the auditorium when her seat was in the middle. There's really no helping some people.


And then there's those who arrive at the theatre before the member of their party who has their tickets and cannot for the LIFE of them imagine why they can't just go in without tickets and wait for their party to arrive. We often did what we could accommodating them in the foyer, but then they'd want full access to bars/toilets everything.


Oh and yes, there are those who intentionally arrive late to "skip the adverts". Yes. That has happened.


I could go on and on and on, but of course the person is always so insistent that it is the staff member's fault.

I accidentally sat in row AA then after the show realised my ticket was for row A the other week. The theatre was pretty empty to it was fine.

Have to agree. I also did this role for many years and when you are alone its difficult to catch everyone and its the ones who walk past with that knowing "I know where I'm going" look that end up sitting in the wrong place. Also you give directions like, along the front of the stage and go up the 2nd aisle and they completely ignore what you have said and go a completely different way. You think to yourself, what's the point!

That's not unique to the theater. I used to work as a hotel concierge and people would ask directions to various landmarks. "Turn left out the front door, right at the corner...." And then you'd see them walking right out of the front door (our desk was in front of the windows to the right of the door). Occasionally, we'd run out after them to set them on the right track.

I agree, the least one can do is applaud the efforts. Perhaps they’d had a blazing row before the show or something, impossible to tell…

I get nervous doing a standing ovation if very few others around me are (I have anxiety and the idea of someone behind me snapping at me that they can’t see I would make me want to die) - but I’d probably get the opposite in this situation. Being the only person to NOT stand up would make me more self conscious even if I didn’t enjoy the show! I can’t imagine the lack of self awareness / care these two audience members had.