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Post by lynette on Feb 18, 2016 0:48:12 GMT
Piss before it starts, piss if it has a break, piss if u pass the national Speaking of which HOW awful are their new men's bogs?! I mean they were crap before but now the decor makes u wana kill yourself God I hope it burns down (can I say that? If I can't then everyone don't read that bit) No you can't say that but if we are talking redevelopment, I bags push the plunger on the explosives. Nice place for a block of flats or one of those daft shaped office blocks. Anything but the block of concrete a backward looking planning panel landed us with in the 50s.
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Post by Snciole on Feb 18, 2016 11:19:46 GMT
The Duffman taps are dribbling again, the soap dispensers aren't working properly so someone has bought some general hand soap.
What exactly did NT Future pay for in this redevelopment?
I also run up to Olivier Cloakroom toilets but I think comes down to age/bladder control. I wouldn't want to risk an incident if I was waiting for a life or going up the stairs but queuing as the interval clock goes down is also ridiculous. I suspect they were designed by men, who simply don't talk to women about toilet usage.
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Post by kathryn on Feb 18, 2016 11:22:23 GMT
I really don't understand why so many people have to dash to the loo during the interval. I'm retired, so obviously my bladder is past the first "flush" of youth, if you'll pardon the expression, but I don't have the constant urge to go. I usually plan my trip so that I can use the facilities elsewhere before reaching the theatre, and pop into a pub or hotel on the way home, if the need arises - but it rarely does. Am I unusual??? I'm one of those people who often goes to the toilet before the show and in the interval. I don't drink huge amounts right before the show and certainly not during act one but I still often end up having to make a toilet dash. I obviously have the bladder of a 90 years old woman. Funny enough I can easily do a three hour immersive theatre show (mostly Sleep no more these days) without going to the toilet once. A lot of my friends rarely go to the toilet at the theatre at all and me jumping out of my seat at the end of act one has become a bit of a running gag. Yeah, me too. The Illiad proved conclusively that I don't actually need to pee that frequently, it's really just a habit/a comfort thing. Also I think it depends what you're drinking - tea always makes me need the loo, water not so much. It must be the caffeine.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 18, 2016 11:29:45 GMT
Tea is a noted diuretic, so yes.
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Post by vickster51 on Feb 18, 2016 14:12:25 GMT
Lyttelton circle level and Olivier cloakroom level toilets, I have NEVER had to queue for those. I also get the funniest looks from the ladies queuing for the Lyttelton stalls toilets when I come downstairs and tell them there's a toilet immediately above their heads that has no queue. They never go though, I should just stop trying to help. I have similarly done that too but have given up as people look at as if you're trying to trick them out of their place in the queue, nearly always head upstairs at the NT as much faster. Same with me. I did that at the Barbican during the Cumber Hamlet time. Wandered to the end of the long queue for the main toilets and said there were others located elsewhere with no queue. No one was interested. Crazy crazy people. Locating secret, quieter toliets in as many theatres as possible is my current goal.
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1,329 posts
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Post by CG on the loose on Feb 19, 2016 0:43:06 GMT
The advantage the serial theatre-goer has over the casual is that we know where the toilets are, which may only give us a 2 second head-start at the interval, but sometimes 2 seconds is all you need. I've never had a cleanliness problem with any of the ladies' toilets though, I do feel bad for the men in this thread. (Actually, I'm beginning to suspect that a good way to avoid toilet queues is to sit quietly in my seat for ten minutes of the interval *then* go to the loo. I suspect most ladies panic about the queues and rush straight there, so as long as they've been fairly efficient working through the queue, there'd be very little left as the end of the interval approaches. I use the facilities before going in though, so I have yet to test this hypothesis.) There are a couple of theatres where, providing I'm sitting in an accessible spot, I wait for the interval bell to nip to the loo. No queue, back in my seat well before most of the meanderers from the bars.
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1,329 posts
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Post by CG on the loose on Feb 19, 2016 0:46:16 GMT
I really don't understand why so many people have to dash to the loo during the interval. I'm retired, so obviously my bladder is past the first "flush" of youth, if you'll pardon the expression, but I don't have the constant urge to go. I usually plan my trip so that I can use the facilities elsewhere before reaching the theatre, and pop into a pub or hotel on the way home, if the need arises - but it rarely does. Am I unusual??? I have a 2+ hour journey home and often no time to stop on route to the station if I'm to catch my last train, so I nearly always go in the interval as theatre loos, even with queues, are infinitely preferable to train loos!
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1,329 posts
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Post by CG on the loose on Feb 19, 2016 0:48:50 GMT
Lyttelton circle level and Olivier cloakroom level toilets, I have NEVER had to queue for those. I also get the funniest looks from the ladies queuing for the Lyttelton stalls toilets when I come downstairs and tell them there's a toilet immediately above their heads that has no queue. They never go though, I should just stop trying to help. I have similarly done that too but have given up as people look at as if you're trying to trick them out of their place in the queue, nearly always head upstairs at the NT as much faster. Same at Birmingham Hippodrome - not with the loos but the bars... huge bar at Circle level, tiny bar at Stalls level. Always nip upstairs if I want a drink but am invariable looked at with great suspicion if I suggest to anyone else they do the same.
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4,631 posts
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Post by Phantom of London on Feb 19, 2016 1:12:19 GMT
For men
The worst toilets in the West End must go to;
The Arts Theatre - No room, if someone comes in you find you are being pushed into the toilet bowl. The Phoneix - Same as above, sure the now toilet used to be a clock room and the Ambassador lounge used to be the Gents, anyone can confirm this? Vaudeville - No Gents on the stalls level, 2 toilets on the stairs, seperate for ones and twos. Drury Lane/Cambride - Both have cheap white tiles, tacky cheap lino, cheapest hand dries. St Martin - For circle toilets, you have to access the toilet by a big flight stairs.
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Xanderl
Member
Not always very high value in terms of ticket yield or donations
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Post by Xanderl on Feb 19, 2016 5:45:31 GMT
Oh God, yes, the gents at the Arts are terrible. I avoid the theatre as a result.
The Leicester Square Theatre gents are similarly cramped and vile.
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219 posts
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Post by PalelyLaura on Feb 19, 2016 11:32:52 GMT
When I went on a backstage tour of the Almeida Theatre, it was explained that architects like symmetry, so they always design male and female toilet spaces to be the same size. Of course, we all know ladies take longer in the loo, hence the massive queues. At the Almeida they purposely designed the toilets so that there was more space for the ladies, and I have to say I rarely have issues queueing up for their loos...
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3,470 posts
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Post by showgirl on Feb 19, 2016 11:42:36 GMT
The Donmar's facilities must be some of the worst, both for being limited and cramped. Only 2 cubicles in the ladies and as so often in the West End (despite this not being an old, traditionally-built venue), you have to be a contortionist to get in and shut the door without leaving outside a portion of yourself or your bags.
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Xanderl
Member
Not always very high value in terms of ticket yield or donations
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Post by Xanderl on Feb 19, 2016 12:05:52 GMT
Gents are similarly cramped at the Donmar, as elsewhere nipping upstairs normally saves time.
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3,470 posts
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Post by showgirl on Feb 19, 2016 12:47:21 GMT
At least with the Donmar, the public toilets in the adjoining enclosed shopping area are nearby, but I wouldn't risk the dash during the interval - fine before curtain up.
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Post by The Matthew on Feb 19, 2016 13:24:28 GMT
Given that toilets aren't revenue-generating space, I've long suspected that many buildings are designed without them and then some underused storage cupboard gets converted at the last minute when someone notices the omission.
And seriously, designers: outward-opening cubicle doors. I can only assume that people who design cubicles that require you to squeeze into the space between the bowl and the wall while trying not to touch either have never actually used a toilet, because they're clearly full of crap.
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Post by Jon on Feb 19, 2016 13:55:23 GMT
Given that toilets aren't revenue-generating space, I've long suspected that many buildings are designed without them and then some underused storage cupboard gets converted at the last minute when someone notices the omission. And seriously, designers: outward-opening cubicle doors. I can only assume that people who design cubicles that require you to squeeze into the space between the bowl and the wall while trying not to touch either have never actually used a toilet, because they're clearly full of crap. i have read that businesses tend to make toilets as cost effective as possible with cheap toilet paper, cheap hand wash etc since they are non revenue generating. There are exceptions, the Delfont Mackintosh theatres toilets at the Prince Edward and Prince of Wales are very good though it amazes me how they managed to increase the ladies and gent in both buildings. One thing I hate about male cubicles is that they're usually only one or two whereas there is loads of urinals. This isn't exclusive to theatres, cinemas usually have only two cubicles per male toilet.
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Post by Snciole on Feb 19, 2016 14:08:33 GMT
Noel Coward had a lovely accessible toilet (the ladies and gents weren't open and the plus being a woman of child bearing age means people think you might be up the duff) but whilst I can see it doesn't generate money it is a basic right to have access to a toilet that doesn't make me feel ill.
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Post by d'James on Feb 19, 2016 14:08:50 GMT
Given that toilets aren't revenue-generating space, I've long suspected that many buildings are designed without them and then some underused storage cupboard gets converted at the last minute when someone notices the omission. And seriously, designers: outward-opening cubicle doors. I can only assume that people who design cubicles that require you to squeeze into the space between the bowl and the wall while trying not to touch either have never actually used a toilet, because they're clearly full of crap. i have read that businesses tend to make toilets as cost effective as possible with cheap toilet paper, cheap hand wash etc since they are non revenue generating. There are exceptions, the Delfont Mackintosh theatres toilets at the Prince Edward and Prince of Wales are very good though it amazes me how they managed to increase the ladies and gent in both buildings. One thing I hate about male cubicles is that they're usually only one or two whereas there is loads of urinals. This isn't exclusive to theatres, cinemas usually have only two cubicles per male toilet. The Prince Edward is the reason I started this thread. They were very nice but the plumbing obviously wasn't very good as only a few bits of paper before me managed to block the single cubicle for men on the top floor. I mean how many seats are on that level? I had to run down to the Stall toilets and back up again in just over 5 mins. Ludicrous. They'd be better putting all cubicles in the men's toilets. I know it might make it take a tiny bit longer but there is space. However, some men seem to be terrible at aiming, say no more. The rule should be at least two cubicles for men on each level.
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Post by Jon on Feb 19, 2016 14:24:07 GMT
The Prince Edward is the reason I started this thread. They were very nice but the plumbing obviously wasn't very good as only a few bits of paper before me managed to block the single cubicle for men on the top floor. I mean how many seats are on that level? I had to run down to the Stall toilets and back up again in just over 5 mins. Ludicrous. They'd be better putting all cubicles in the men's toilets. I know it might make it take a tiny bit longer but there is space. However, some men seem to be terrible at aiming, say no more. The rule should be at least two cubicles for men on each level. I think in an ideal world, all male toilets should be cubicles only but again it likely more cost effective to have urinals. Blockages tend to cause by people stupidly stuffing too much loo roll into the bowl, I've seen urinals flood because someone decides to put tissue there.
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Post by Phantom of London on Feb 19, 2016 19:20:01 GMT
Anyone on here can confirm what I posted earlier, that the Gents in the Stalls in the Phoenix was this originally a cloakroom and was what now is the Ambassador Lounge next to, was this the original Gents toilets?
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Post by greenice on Feb 20, 2016 13:40:30 GMT
In my experience a lot of theatre gents toilets have 1 basin and dryer for around 5 toilets, cubicles and urinals. Doesn't sound a lot but it seems to work, maybe because about that proportion of guys actually wash their hands afterwards.
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Post by Flim Flam on Feb 20, 2016 13:50:49 GMT
In my experience a lot of theatre gents toilets have 1 basin and dryer for around 5 toilets, cubicles and urinals. Doesn't sound a lot but it seems to work, maybe because about that proportion of guys actually wash their hands afterwards. Eeeewww.
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Xanderl
Member
Not always very high value in terms of ticket yield or donations
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Post by Xanderl on Feb 21, 2016 11:23:29 GMT
I see that the Old Vic now has to employ an usher to manage the queue for the ladies loo! He was coming in for a fair number of complaints, possibly from people who'd paid over £100 for tickets and had higher expectations of the availability of facilities
Also yesterday - weird gents arrangements at the Vaudeville. No gents at stalls level. One floor up - urinals only, dress circle level - cubicles only
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Post by Phantom of London on Feb 21, 2016 13:24:35 GMT
So no toilet for the stalls then?!?!?
Dorfman it pays to pop next door in the Understudy, which has the largest toilet anywhere in the National.
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Post by lynette on Feb 21, 2016 13:34:46 GMT
I see that the Old Vic now has to employ an usher to manage the queue for the ladies loo! He was coming in for a fair number of complaints, possibly from people who'd paid over £100 for tickets and had higher expectations of the availability of facilities Also yesterday - weird gents arrangements at the Vaudeville. No gents at stalls level. One floor up - urinals only, dress circle level - cubicles only The Old Vic should be ashamed of itself. It has known for yonks - I think Mr Spacey even commented on it - that the ladies' loos were in the wrong place and inadequate. Any builder worth his salt can refigure the downstairs so that women do not have to stand for ages while men push past them at a rate of knots. And the price they now charge for tix there, well, come on gals, let's make a fuss next time we go. Loud voices, emails and letters....Plenty of other theatres to patronise, eh?
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Xanderl
Member
Not always very high value in terms of ticket yield or donations
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Post by Xanderl on Feb 21, 2016 19:07:07 GMT
Phantom: I think Vaudeville has ladies loos at stalls level
Lynette: given they have: - reconfigured the auditorium twice - completely refurbished the foyers - repainted and carpeted the stairs - refurbished both bars - installed a kitchen in the downstairs bar
And still done f*** all about the bogs, you have a point
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Post by DuchessConstance on Feb 22, 2016 23:59:59 GMT
Duchamp's Auditorium.
(Or just for Parsley: Bend it Like Duchamp?).
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Post by Deleted on Feb 23, 2016 11:04:34 GMT
Dorfman it pays to pop next door in the Understudy, which has the largest toilet anywhere in the National. PLEASE tell me you mean simply by number of cubicles... ... otherwise on my next visit to the NT, I'm going to be terribly disappointed to trek all the way to the Understudy and then not see a 20ft tall bowl and cistern installation >.<. Actually Theatremonkey it's their latest foyer exhibition
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Post by lynette on Feb 23, 2016 15:52:08 GMT
PLEASE tell me you mean simply by number of cubicles... ... otherwise on my next visit to the NT, I'm going to be terribly disappointed to trek all the way to the Understudy and then not see a 20ft tall bowl and cistern installation >.<. Actually Theatremonkey it's their latest foyer exhibition Well they need to put something in that foyer.
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Post by Anniek on Feb 24, 2016 8:50:52 GMT
Guys, guys, It's a priviledge to pee!
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